Life is hard sometimes...

This morning, while I was having a text chat with my friend Darby... out of no where I sent her a text saying... "life is hard sometimes...  and life can be really unfair." She wrote back saying "truer words have never been spoken."

And I guess what we are experiencing is, life. Life has it's ups and downs and honestly, I think we all experience multiple downs in life, but there are far more ups that help us get through the low points. I know/hope that God has something wonderful in store for our lives that will help ease our pain from this loss. And only He knows when our grief will ease, but right now, please know that your prayers are getting us through this difficult time.

So many of you have been shoulders to lean and cry on during this time. Even though the only people who have actually been here for us to hug and cry with is my parents, the rest of you are in different cities and different states — even some in different countries. Some of you have experienced the pain we are experiencing now, and some of you have a different kind of hurt that you've overcome.

When I was starting this post, my aunt called to let me know she was thinking of us and praying for us. We were talking about not understanding why things happen and it hit me that she may not have been through this kind of hurt, but she lost my uncle at an early age to cancer right after they had two little girls. And while we have two different kind of hurts, we both have the question of "why?" It's been many years since he passed away, but she said sometimes it hurts like it happened yesterday. But then the pain is overshadowed by a happy time.

I guess that's what I'm feeling now... sad and happy. Yes, I'm still crying a lot, and yes there is still a lot of pain, but I'm happy and grateful that we were able to get pregnant, and carry our baby for 11 weeks. I remember how happy we were when we found out that day. How excited we were when we saw our baby and the heartbeat for the first time. And I truly hope we get to experience that pure joy again. The grief is painful... and it hurts. But we wouldn't be experiencing this grief without the wonderful moments that we shared with our baby during the 7 weeks that we knew we were expecting.
 
Everyday is a new day, yet everyday we wake up and remember. This last week seems like the longest week of our life, but we know that this is all part of His plan for us. And while our questions are left unanswered... still we know that somehow we will get through this, and life will be full of more happy times ahead.