The Desires of My Heart

Saturday, May 12, 2018

As a little girl a long, long time ago I would play with my baby dolls and pretend I was their mother. As a teenager (only a few years ago, wink) I would babysit babies and children from our church. I learned changing poopy diapers was, well gross and that kids have a mine of their own and can’t always be easily persuaded to watch something other than cartoons on tv. As a young adult I watched friends get married and have children of their own. I treated their children like they were my own, spoiling them and loving them. As a thirty something year old wife, I lost our first child at eleven weeks. After months of trying after our loss, I wondered if I would ever have a child of my own. I prayed and begged God to give me a second chance at being a mom. 

Then one day I had a feeling I needed to take a test so I took two. Both were positive. The only thing I could do was cry and shout praises and thanks because I knew it was God who had blessed us with the hope another child. A child we both knew we longed for and already loved. 

She was born nine months later and changed my world. Suddenly my wants and desires were centered around her. I never wanted to put her down. I never wanted to leave her. I wanted to give her the world. And at the time that meant any and everything from Target and Toys R Us. She was her daddy’s girl and her mamas world! She still is. She’s now a little girl who wears her heart on her sleeve, who loves her mommy and daddy, and also her little sister. 

Getting pregnant the third time was much easier than the second time. It happened so fast and we were now going to have two girls fifteen months apart! Some say because we got pregnant so close together that we made Avery grow up faster than she needed to. Maybe yes, but also no. God knew she needed a little sister, and he knew we needed another little girl, but this time a feisty and spunky little squirt. She completed our family. She also changed our world because now we have two little girls that are Daddy’s girls and their mamas world. 

Being a mom hasn’t been the easiest job I’ve ever had. It’s tough, y’all! It’s a blessing for sure. It’s questioning everyday if you are raising them the way you should. It’s learning that Gods grace is enough for you, and that we should show grace to them. It’s trying. It’s rewarding! It’s laughing at their funny dances and silly sayings. It’s worrying everyday if you are enough. It’s loving them more than you love yourself - ten times more! 

I am their mother, mama, mom. I’m the only mom they have (whether they like it or not). I’m doing the best I can at making decisions that are best for them, and for us as a family. I know we only get one shot at raising them right. I pray that even though my parenting ways may differ from other moms that my way is best for us and them. I pray I’m not screwing up their childhood. I pray they know how much I love them, always. 

It was the desire of my heart to be a mom. And my dreams are now my reality. Everyday is a blessing with them. And everyday I thank the good Lord above for making me their mama. 

This Mother’s Day we know a few who are waiting for their turn to be a mom. Terry and I know how it feels to long for a baby, and it can be just as hard on the husband as it is for the wife. We pray their wait isn’t long. We hope this next year brings tears of joy for Mother’s Day! 

For all the moms of preschoolers, we just have to keep telling ourselves that we are enough. We are enough as a mom and a wife! And that the terrible twos, threenager, and fournado years won’t last forever. 

Strawberry Lemonade Pie

Wednesday, May 9, 2018

It's H O T in the South y'all. I'm talking Spring completely skipped right over us. And if we weren't already a glutton for punishment, we went to the strawberry patch to pick us a batch of strawberries earlier this week. I'm not sure I even made it to the passenger side of the vehicle to get the girls out before I was doing some major glistening sweatin'. But our sweet friends asked us to go and we were excited because this would be our first time pickin' strawberries.

The patch we went to was about a forty-five minute drive from our house. It didn't take us long to pick our buckets full. We were worried they wouldn't have many left — wrong! They had so many ripe strawberries that we didn't even go all the way down our two rows before filling up four buckets.

Avery kept telling me on the way to the field that she couldn't wait to make a strawberry cake. And seeing as how I've never made anything with strawberries in it, I had no clue how many strawberries it would take. Needless to say, four buckets = strawberries running out our ears. So we have been sharing a couple of buckets with our neighbors and friends since I found out most recipes only call for a cup or less. Whoops!

Did I mention that it's H O T? And I'm not about to turn that oven on to make it even hotter in here. (Y'all I'm sure our sweet neighbor is reading this and laughing. She knows to wear a sweater to our house because I like it freezing in here!) Since I didn't want to turn the oven on I got to thinking about a good way we could use the strawberries. Smoothies. Yes. But Avery really wanted to "bake" something. So I thought about the very first recipe my mom taught me — Lemon Ice Box Pie. It's the first thing she let me make on my own to carry to church and other functions when I was in high school. I thought incorporating the strawberries in that recipe might be a fun idea. And, well, it was perfect!

1/4 cup of lemon juice
1 1/2 cups of pureed strawberries
1 14 oz. of sweetened condensed milk
1 8 oz. tub of cool whip (thawed)
1 graham cracker ready crust

Combine lemon juice, strawberry puree and sweetened condensed milk and whisk together until blended. Add the entire tub of cool whip folding it in with the previous ingredients. Pour into the graham cracker crust and let it set in the fridge for three to four hours. When serving, garish with more strawberry puree and/or lemon zest.

This is the perfect cool treat for these crazy summer days!
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